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A Conversation with my Grandmother


Avanti Old Lady Driving Car Birthday CardMe:  Hi Gram! I got a new car!

Gram: Oh, that is good, dear. What colour is it?

Me: Black.

Gram: *crickets*

Me: You don’t like black?

Gram: No. I don’t like black or green.

Me: Really? Those are my two absolute favourite colours.

Gram: I like red.

Me: Yes, Mom has a nice red colour car, doesn’t she?

Gram: *crickets*

Me: What, you don’t like the colour of her car, either?

Gram: No. I like FIRE ENGINE red.

I adore this woman.

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  1. So awesome… but what makes this post SOOO awesome is the photo.

  2. And from the look of things so would I. Though my own car is a very dull silver.

  3. Old people and their quirky ways…

  4. It’s never good enough, is it! 😆

  5. Ha! I adore that photo! Your Gran sounds fun! :)

  6. what!? i would have never guessed. great post!

  7. Okay, I cannot believe I am about to post this in your comments, but someone sent me this poem back before the days of e-mail chain letters, when these things actually got circulated by (gasp!) paper, and I have always remembered it and always loved it.

    With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.
    And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
    And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter.
    I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
    And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
    And run my stick along the public railings
    And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
    I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
    And pick the flowers in other people’s gardens
    And learn to spit

    You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
    And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
    Or only bread and pickle for a week
    And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes

    But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
    And pay our rent and not swear in the street
    And set a good example for the children.
    We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

    But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
    So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
    When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

    (By Jenny Joseph)

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