After making my first visit to the largest Ikea in Canada, I find this rather perplexing since I would much rather shop at my local Walmart than my new, huge, local Ikea, that’s for sure. Perhaps it’s that Ikea, with its design aesthetic and clever ads, is just more trendy and easier to like? More, how shall we say … yuppie.

I’m sure there are lots of sophisticated reasons for hating Walmart more than Ikea, but really, I think we’ve all probably been too gentle on our Swedish friend. Both pay their employees low wages, both have a significant impact on landscape due to the sheer size of their stores, both list China as a major supplier, and both encourage mass consumption.

But let’s put aside the “big perspective,” for a moment and let me rant, as an individual, about how irksome my recent shopping experience was at Ikea.

1. Reserved Parking for Hybrid Vehicles: As I pulled into the parking lot, I noticed a whole bunch of available parking spots right near the front. I assumed these spots were reserved for drivers with disabilities. But nooooo … these were for hybrid vehicles. Ha! Who does Ikea think its target market really is? The people shopping at Ikea are driving in from the suburbs in their mini-vans and SUVs or hitching a ride with their roommate in a beat-up second-hand car. Silly Ikea. Those hybrid car owners are strolling about their local, gentrified neighbourhood boutiques. So, there they sat — all these prime parking spots — empty.

2. No Windows: Enclosed spaces are not for humans. They might be necessary for transporting humans — like elevators or airplanes — but they are generally unpleasant. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be building codes for bedrooms to have windows, or office designs built around windows. Windows are pleasant. There are no windows where the products are in Ikea stores. It’s the same premise that casinos use, which helps people lose track of time and spend more money. Ikea’s funneling system (see #3) seems to magnify the effect that no windows has upon me.

3. The Lab Rat Syndrome: All Ikeas are built to push consumers past every single one of their wares. It is a single funnel that you are extruded through like an object or animal …. or, well, worse. The smaller Ikea we had in Ottawa did this of course, but its scale was so much smaller that it was merely irksome. On this more massive, larger scale? We moved between feeling like cattle being prodded through to the slaughterhouse to lab rats being observed from up high as we muddled through a maze. It felt uncomfortable. Too controlled. I had to fight an overwhelming sensation to run madly screaming, “Help! Where’s the exit?!”

4. Enviro-Cool: It seems that Ikea has jumped on the enviro-cool wagon. I’m all for enviro-friendly, but enviro-cool is just grating. Take the hybrid parking noted above. This is touted as one of their many eco-friendly features. But who are they kidding? All Ikea furniture is destined for the landfill — it cannot be passed down from generation to generation, heck, it can’t even be used second-hand because it won’t last long enough for that! Another stat used in virtually every press release and blog post that I read noted that this Ottawa Ikea store was 40% more efficient than its last store. Sure, that’s great … but if it really wanted to be enviro-friendly, it wouldn’t be the 18 times larger than the arena at ScotiaBank Place! The size is just crazy big. Too big, in fact, to be enjoyable (see #3).

Photography credit: Julie Oliver, Ottawa Citizen.

5. The Ottawa Sky-Line: Anyone who has recently driven eastward from Kanata on the Queensway on the way home from work has wondered: “Huh? What is that large light?” Only to find that it is the new, huge electronic billboard on the side of the Ikea building. Change to the horizon and our day-to-day landscape is inevitable, but this one is so ugly that it’s hard not to feel a little put out by it.

So there we have it: why I did not enjoy shopping in the new and “improved” Ottawa Ikea. In this case, I didn’t find bigger to be better. You? Love or hate, share your tales in the comments below.

This poem, Taking a Stand, was penned by John Bailey, who is a former regular and now serving Territorial Army soldier who served in Afghanistan in 2008. In 2009, a member of his unit, Corporal Steven Boote, was killed along with four others by a rogue Afghan policeman. He spent the day in Wootton Bassett the day their bodies were repatriated and that night he wrote this poem as a comment on TA service in general but more importantly as a tribute to ”Booty.” (source)

Taking a Stand

I ask you to stand with me
For both the injured and the lost
I ask you to keep count with me
Of all the wars and what they cost
I ask you to be silent with me
Quietly grateful for our lot
As I expect you’re as thankful as me
For the health and life we’ve got
I ask that you wish them well with me
All those still risking their all
And I ask that you remember with me
The names of those that fall
I expect that you are proud like me
Of this great nation of ours too
So enjoying all its freedoms like me
Support those upholding them for you
I hope that you are hopeful like me
That we’ll soon bring an end to wars
So you’ll have to stand no more with me
And mourning families no different from yours
‘Til then be thankful you can stand with me
Thinking of those who now cannot
For standing here today with me
At least we show they’re not forgot

By John Bailey

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

The Invite:

I’m turning 40 in October, but I sure didn’t get here alone … each of you gorgeous women has played a special part in my life and as a little thank-you, I hope you can join me for a fun get-together!

We’ll be literally be partying like it’s 1984 since we’ll be acting like big kids as we do a SPLATTER PAINT PARTY!  

Details: You need to wear old clothes AND shoes! There is a refreshment room so if anyone is up for bring potluck snacks, go for it. Absolutely no gifts, please. 

See you there my friends … 

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

Photo Credit: Andrea Tomkins

Hubby: Sweetheart, it’s your 40th. You should have a party. How about I organize a party for you.

Me: Uh, remember, I don’t do fun.

Hubby: But, it’s your 40th.

Me: I’m having an entire “Month of Me,” so it’s not like I’m depriving myself or anything.

Hubby: Oh yeah. But are you sure?

Me: Yes.

Hubby: Okay, well, while I’m away camping this weekend, why don’t you think about it.

Me: But I said I was sure.

Hubby: If you gave me a list of names, we could have a cocktail party here.

Me: I don’t like adult parties.

Hubby: But it’s your 40th.

Me: I prefer kid’s parties. You book a place, you show up with a cake, there is an activity, a host to herd people around, and then after 2 hours, it’s all done and everyone goes home.

Hubby: *sigh* Okay, well, just think about it while I’m away, will you?

Me: Okay, I will.

******************
Hubby: So, did you think about the party thing?

Me: Yes.

Hubby: And?

Me: It’s all organized.

Hubby: What? I was supposed to organize it for you.

Me: Er, yeah. But it’s all organized — all done.

Hubby: Okay, what is it?

Me: You know that place I told you about for Stella’s 9th birthday party: The 4 Cats Art Studio?

Hubby: Yeah …

Me: Well, I talked to the owner Emaly and she said she’d be happy to host me and my girlfriends on a Friday night.

Hubby: Oh. Okay …

Me: It’s gonna be sooo cool! We’re all going to show up wearing sweat pants and old clothes on and have a splatter paint party!

Hubby: You know it’s your 40th, right?

Me: Don’t remind me.

To be continued …..

********

Here is how Jordan and Brian explain the Project Priceless wedding on their website.

Project: Priceless is an experiment. The goal: to get Brian and Jordan married in the next year, as free-of-charge as possible. The method: the happy couple will borrow, trade, and accept offers of all the items and services that make up a wedding. Everyone who contributes to the occasion gets a shout-out, and any businesses or artisans who contribute get big shout-outs. Contribute, or follow along just for fun to see how things are going.

Can a community chip in and create a priceless wedding for an awesome couple? Let’s find out…

*******

I do love a wedding. But mostly, if I’m honest, I think I love weddings because they allow me to be flooded with all the memories of my own wedding, 15 years ago.

While so much of Jordan and Brian’s wedding was radically different than my own (like the Chaplan, Dr. Alan Viau, inviting all the guests to use the wedding hashtag and tweet out photos, for example!), there was so much love in the air that while my body was sitting in the fairytale setting of Stanley’s Olde Maple Lane Farm with the sun shining down on this young couple …

… my heart was under century-old gum trees in southern Australia, saying “I do” one more time …

While our decor for the reception was freshly cut sunflowers that had been lovingly grown from seeds by my mother-in-law and her husband on their farm, the Project Priceless decor included bright green and purple pom-poms that a friend had taught them out to make:

I’m sure you’ll agree that this decor looks fabulous! It was so fresh and fun, I just loved it. But what really made it all so especially cool were the personal touches. Imagine my delight, for example, when I sat at my place-setting and found a handwritten and handcrafted card thank-you card.

In fact, absolutely everything was handcrafted! Countless — countless! — hours must have gone into the preparations.

And in case you’re wondering why there were crayons in the photo above, it’s because each place-setting had one of those paper placements like they provide to children in restaurants to keep them busy. On it, guests were invited to complete a custom crossword puzzle as well as to doodle a picture of the bride and groom.

There were also a number of new traditions that, if I were to be married today, I would certainly love to incorporate into my wedding. I think I already mentioned the wedding tattoos. I love the idea of wedding tattoos, and I love this specific tattoo that Jordan and Brian had created by artist Sarah Rogers of Living Colour Tattoo.

I also think a candy table is, of course, pure genius! This table in particular was particularly amazing because it was from none other than The Candy Store. Oh so good! And all colour-coordinated to match the wedding colours of green, orange and purple!

And I would certainly follow this tradition: An In-Spirit Table. For so many reasons, I thought this was really special. This table was a collection of memorabilia from those who could not make it to the wedding, as well as those who had already passed on. These people were there “in spirit.”

***************

At the end of the evening, when the cake had been cut, the first dances had been had, and I felt I had done the best job I could as a live-tweeter, I slipped out into the evening air back to the parking lot to drive myself home.

I looked up and took a moment to admire the stars, so bright in the country sky. I had only been here at this wedding for but a few hours, and yet, it felt like I’d been wisked away to somewhere magical.

**************

When I got home, Hubby asked me how it had all gone. I told him it had been wonderful, just wonderful. Still slightly baffled by it all, he said, “Why was it called ‘project priceless’? Because it hadn’t cost them anything?”

I said, yes, I guess so. But I knew it was so much more. This social experiment was much more than a wedding without a price tag. So much more.

When Jordan sent me the details about the Project Priceless wedding, the only thing that registered in my head was the date: August 22nd. I couldn’t recall anything already scheduled for that date, so I just replied “yes” right away to her email. And then I told Hubby that he was coming to a wedding with me sometime at the end of August.

Weeks pass and I realize that the wedding is fast approaching. My way of coping with the multi-taking world of working motherhood is to function on a “need to know basis.” This system helps keep the clutter out of my brain. What this means is that I didn’t figure I needed to know all the details about the wedding locale and time before accepting. I only needed to know that information the day before, or maybe even on the day of, to get myself there on time and to the right location.

This “need to know basis” of filing info in my brain works 9 out of 10 times. Unfortunately, this was going to be one of those times when the system failed me.

I dug through my emails and pulled out the invitation. Oh. Oh dear.

I had assumed that the wedding would take place on a Saturday and the reception would be in the evening. But that is a traditional wedding. Not a project priceless wedding! Of course, with everything for the wedding being a donation from the community, the day of the week and the time weren’t going to be when all the other paying customers have their weddings booked. I hadn’t thought of that at all. The wedding was scheduled for a Monday night. Oops, Hubby wasn’t going to be able to be my date after all. I quickly shot off an email to Jordan begging her not to scream or cry, but that I was going to have to muck with her table settings. She took it well. Or at least she took it with a shot of vodka (who’s to know really, since I don’t actually know her that well, remember?).

Okay, next challenge was that the ceremony was scheduled for 5 pm. Oh, 5 pm. Hmm … I guess I could get to work at 8 and leave at 4 and still manage to pull it off.

Nope. One more detail that I hadn’t noted in my lovely “need to know” system — the location was in Edwards. More than a full hour’s drive from my office in Kanata.

Alrighty, then. I’ll need to do a quick change at work and leave at 3:30 pm. Not ideal, because the deliverables at the office will still need to be delivered, which means extra hours for me in the evening.

All in all, I was getting pretty irked at my “need to know” system. But I’d already committed to attend, so I was just going to have to make this work.

So as 3:30 pm on Monday hit, I slipped out of the office and to the women’s washrooms. Here is the before:

I have thrown a striped jersey jacket over a little black dress. Normally, I would never show the knees in the office, but what the heck, I needed a quick change! To make up for the skin show, I had slipped on some cute, but conservative, shoes and hoped no one would notice the difference.

All I had to do was take off the jersey, throw on a silky shawl (which has great karma since it was from my BFF’s wedding when I was one of her bridesmaids ten years ago) over top of the dress and then change shoes (more great karma since I bought these three months after my son was born to wear to another excellent couple’s wedding in Australia).

All in all, the quick change worked out just fine. Unfortunately, there is nothing “quick” I can do about those bags under my eyes though!

With the quick change complete, I rushed back out to my car only to realize that I’d left the driving directions up at my office. I was not going to go back to the office all decked out — especially at 3:30 pm! So, I made an emergency call to Hubby to google-up some directions for me.

I finally took off on my way, but as the minutes in the drive passed, I was started to sweat thinking I was going to arrive late — right in the middle of the ceremony … you know, “Does anyone have any objections?” and out comes Julie stumbling in her heels from the parking lot. Not a good vision, let me tell you!

As I was starting getting close, the road turned into a dirt road. Oh oh, I hope I didn’t take a wrong turn! Eventually I saw with relief the sign to Stanley’s Old Maple Lane Farm, where the wedding was going to be held. I turn the wheel into the drive only to realize that the gate is closed. Gah! A panicked swinging of the head suggested that the next lane up was the one for me. As I start to back up, a blonde woman in grey Prius starts turning into the same laneway right behind me. I start laughing like a crazy lady …

The cute blonde in the Prius is my co-tweeter for this event: Andrea from a peek inside the fishbowl. And she looks like she’s just as anxious as me that she’s going to arrive in the middle of the ceremony too!

But alas, we arrive, and the whole scene is a picture of calm on the farm. It seems the ceremony isn’t starting until 5:30 pm! We take a few deep breaths, and get ourselves ready for our roles as live-tweeters.

photo credit: Andrea Tomkins

To be continued …. (in the meantime, you can check out Andrea’s post on the Project Priceless wedding) …..

Tonight, I’m attending a stranger’s wedding and I’ll be live-tweeting it the entire time. Here’s how he noted this on our family calendar:

So, yes, I am going to “someone’s” wedding.

Well, to be fair, the bride is not a complete stranger. I did speak with her for about 15-20 minutes at the Social Capital Conference, and introduced her to you in my recap post of that event. That’s right — it’s Jordan, and the Project Priceless wedding.

In keeping with her and finance’s social media focus, she’s asked a few local bloggers to attend the wedding and “cover it” by live-tweeting. Sure, it’s a little unusual, but whatever. I’ll be there. I’ve got my heels waiting for me in the car for when I slip out of the office, and they’re a shiny black patent — you know, to match with my central accessory: my smart phone.

If you’d like to follow along, the twitter hashtag for the wedding is #ppwedding and start time is 5pm. No worries if you don’t have a twitter account, Jordan explains how you can follow along.

I spent one of my only free days of the week at an all-day conference, paid for out of my own pocket. Insanity? My Hubby might agree. But I, for one, was certainly not going to miss Ottawa’s first social media conference! Organized by a smart group of folks who I all consider to be my friends due to our connections on Twitter and via blogging, I was also there to support their efforts and help keep the attendance numbers high. Well, I needn’t have worried. The conference, which had an attendance cap of 150, was completely sold out. And by lunchtime, the participants were already talking of “next year.”

No doubt, excellent recaps of this event will be created (check out By the Brooks for a recap/review post, Nolie’s Place for top tips learned at the event, and Keep Your Head Up‘s liveblogging for a detailed experience), so I feel freed-up to simply share some of my own personal best moments of the conference.

IRL peeps

For social media nerds like me, “IRL” means “In Real Life.” And the IRL experience was the most fulfilling part of the day for me. (It’s not always this way … sometimes I like the virtual person much better than the IRL person!)  Yesterday, I had a chance to meet some online folks that I’ve been following for ages. This included Joe Boughner, Kathy Buckworth, Glen Gower, and Nick Charney.

But Social Capital also gave me the pleasure of meeting some brand new faces. Here are a few that immediately come to mind:

Sarah Wilson (aka Miss Ability)

I ended up at the same table for lunch with a woman named Sarah. Petite and soft-spoken, she had a quiet confidence that intrigued me. So, we got to talking and I had the opportunity to hear about her newly launched business called Miss Ability.

Sure, people are launching their own businesses every day, but my experience is that so many people don’t launch their businesses well. They print up cards at Staples or in their own home office, start handing them around and wonder why no one is taking an interest.

Sarah, on the other hand, is the kind of new business owner that I really respect. She has been doing all the prep work to ensure her company is well-branded and professional from the start. Here’s her business card:

Sarah had a good “elevator pitch,” that immediately helped me understand her business concept. And if you check out the Miss Ability website, you can see that the business has a clear mission statement:

To give people a platform, whether disabled or not, to communicate.  Also, to allow the disabled community the ability to have a lifestyle they feel they deserve. Promoting affordability and reducing time constraints I’m providing options that are affordable and attainable at any income level or class; whether you are upper, middle or lower.

So, yeah, she was really cool. That made my $75 entry to the conference worthwhile already. Then I met:

Jordan from Project Priceless

I was immediately drawn to Jordan because I wanted to check out her shoes. Yes, I love shoes and she was rockin’ some mighty cute ones! But her shoes were just the tip of the ice berg — she has a really unique style about her. And her sparkling smile didn’t hurt one bit either.

Her story was fun. Her fiance Brian and she launched a project called “Priceless” — a “free” wedding experiment.

Can they beg, borrow, and get donations all the way to the alter?

Although this project and the blog that keeps it all tied together have attracted a lot of media attention, I had not yet heard about it. Clever and so creative, Jordan and her project reminded me of something my younger (“baby”) sister would do. I had a wonderful time talking weddings, dresses, and the Slice channel with her and a number of other women at the table. Here is a photo of Jordan and Brian, proudly displaying their wedding tattoos, which were traded for services with Sarah Rogers of Living Colour.

Jordan and Brian have their wedding scheduled for this August 22nd and you can bet that I’ll be following along and wishing them well! So, yeah, more Ottawa-cool. Then I met:

Ward Minnis, producer of the play The Cabinet

I walked into one of the sessions late and grabbed the only seat I could see. During the session, the man on the left of me asked a question, and then after the session, he and a group of us were chatting for a bit. As it turns out, he has just produced his own play called The Cabinet, which is a political comedy set in the fictional Archipelago Islands. The play premiered April 1st, 2011 and ran for 12 shows in Ward’s home town of Nassau. Here is a promotional poster for The Cabinet:

As a fellow writer, I shared a chuckle with him about his twitter bio. It reads:

Writing stories and trying to make a living off of it. Yes, I am crazy.

He was a really likeable guy, and very modest about his accomplishment of pulling off the production of his very own play. I’ve since checked out his About Me page and he’s got a lot going on! From plays, to visual art and graphic design, to academics and opinion essay writing — this is one interesting person. I really hope his next play will be set in Ottawa!

So, thank you so much to Social Capital for this event, without which I never would have had the fortune of meeting Sarah, Jordan and Ward! I am really looking forward to this becoming an annual event. (Gee, no pressure, eh?)

Otherwheres and other news on the Internets:

Social Capital is featured in today’s Citizen; Coffee with Julie is included in a Canadian Family magazine’s list of favourite bloggers; and Stella’s camping tips have been used in a “flashback” post on the Kids in the Capital community blog.

Andrea Tomkins blogs at a peek inside the fishbowl, where she has been known to write about crafty things, recipes, and other fun stuff for Ottawa parents. You can also follow her adventures on Facebook or on Twitter.

Harry Potter crafting
by Andrea Tomkins

Now that the last movie is out, Harry Potter mania has returned to our household.

A few years ago, the Harry Potter series was our family bedtime reading. Every night (starting from the first book) we’d read a chapter together. When we finally made it through all seven, my youngest daughter picked up the first book in the series and read them all herself. Now that’s a fan.

Although we started with the books, the movies were great too. We watched each one after we finished each book. What’s more, we drove down to see the Harry Potter exhibit when it was in Toronto last summer. We bought chocolate frogs and some Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans and came close to buying a Marauder’s Map (but it was pricey so we left it behind). This got me thinking. What kind of Harry Potter crafts can we make at home?

Here are a few of the things we have made. 

Magic wands

• First, we combed the backyard for the perfect stick. We have also found great sticks (they have to be perfectly straight and just the right length) by the curb after a neighbour’s tree trimming. Stick choice is immensely personal and requires time and patience to find just the right one.
• Green sticks (that is, freshly cut ones) have new bark that can be peeled off fairly easily. When the bark is removed it results in a lovely smooth texture that dries really nicely.
• I could have grabbed the glue gun and embellished them with beads and feathers, but we left them as is for a perfectly natural-looking wands. (Which was a good thing because the dog got hold of one.)

Quills

We found the perfect goose feathers down by the Ottawa River the other day; huge and totally pristine, BUT from what I’ve seen online I realized that making a quill was going to be a heck of a lot more difficult than I had thought. The process is long and involves tempering (!) and slicing the nib of the sheath and shaping it just so.  (See what I mean?) I wasn’t sure I wanted to set out on this road, so in the meantime we have been pretending it’s a real quill.

Coins

We had great success making gold galleons. This is the perfect craft, because it takes a bit of time and resourcefulness and teaches kids how to swing a hammer.

• Raid dad’s beer bottle “collection” for caps
• Find a good surface to work on (we decided to work outdoors on the patio).
• Grab a hammer and flatten all the caps.
• Paint your “coins” with gold spray paint. (Maybe mom should do this part.)

Tuck them into a little drawstring pouch when they’re dry. (We happened to have a black velvet one from the LCBO. Perfect!)

There are some neat ideas over at Instructibles for other Harry Potter-related crafty projects. I’m not sure what we should make next. I really like the Mad Eye Moody Eye (it’d be fun to wear to the last movie!) and am intrigued by this wand. Tough call. Maybe I’ll just make us some butterbeer and think about it a little more.

We decided to move.

We did our mourning for our reno dream. We looked, and looked, and looked some more for the right home. And then, we found it. By happenstance really. My girlfriend, who lives in a really great neighbourhood, mentioned that she thought her neighbours might be moving sometime soon. I then began an email communications with the owners. And in the meantime, we kept looking, and looking, and looking. But we kept coming back to this house.

So we bought it.

And now we are moved into our new home, and slowly but surely getting all the boxes unpacked. It feels so right here for us. Which is a mighty relief. We are really so very happy.

p.s. I’m a guest poster on Andrea’s blog A Peek Inside the Fishbowl today! You might enjoy my “sage” advice to her on the advantages of reno’ing over moving house.