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September 5th, 2011

The Back-to-School Outfit

Back-to-school is here! As usual, summer has whizzed right by and we’re back into the busy fall season (both at work and at home). This summer was a milestone for us — we moved houses for the first time in 14 years and we enjoyed a special visit from overseas relatives. But we’re ready for routines again, I think. That’s one bonus of school-aged children; it helps the whole family get into consistent routines.

Not to be outdone by Valentine’s Day or other commercially created and flogged-to-death occasions to spend money, the back-to-school ads have been incessant. Not only do you *need* a new wardrobe, but also brand-new stationery, and the latest and greatest technology gadgets.

Now, don’t get me wrong …. when I was a kid, I loved — loved! — back to school. I loved the fall weather, the classroom, reconnecting with friends and the back-to-shopping trip my mother would always treat me too. Looking back, I have no idea how my parents managed to afford it with four children, but somehow I was always kitted out with new clothes and goodies for the pencil case.

But for us, the back-to-school shopping event is turning out to be more of a non-event. Stella has no interest in fashion and hey, who says you actually need a brand-new outfit for the first day of school? The advertisements do, that’s who. So, we are taking Stella’s lead and adopting a far more simpler and less stress-inducing approach.

Here is the outfit she would like to wear for tomorrow’s first day:

I’m not sure if it will be shorts weather or jeans weather, so both are out and ready. The shorts and jeans are regular features in her closet — both from The Children’s Place, which has a line of jeans that is perfect for Stella’s slim body type, as well as shorts that I consider “nice” and not “short-shorts.” We have the shorts in pretty much every colour and about five pairs of the jeans since Stella, like her father, prefers jeans over any other kind of pant. The shoes are a New Balance pair that we picked up late last school season when she outgrew her other pair of “indoor” shoes. I’m a big believer that the indoor shoes the school requests should be shoes designed for exercise with good cushioning and support, since the kids wear these shoes for gym class. Out of all the clothing elements a child has, I think shoes are the best investment for a growing body. These ones still fit perfectly and are in good condition, so it would be wasteful to toss them simply because they’re not pure white any more.

So, did you add all that up? Yep, a total of $0.00.

But wait, there is one brand new item. A never-worn-before item kept aside specifically for the new school season. And it’s this t-shirt:

Ontario Parks has created a number of nice lines of clothing for toddlers, kids, and adults. This one is from the Species at Risk line, and features the Eastern Wolf. We picked it up on our recent camping trip to Achray, but you can also buy them online (cost is $16.95).

In addition to this Eastern Wolf shirt, we picked up one with a butterfly on it. And during the summer, Stella and I happened upon some great Chinese dragon (a fave creature) shirts that were on sale for $3 each somewhere. So, in total, there are about 4 new shirts for the season.

All up, then, the back-to-school wardrobe this season totalled less than $40.00.

How did you make it through the season? Is your bank account still suffering? What were your top picks or most favourite finds?

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August 24th, 2011

The Project Priceless Wedding: Was this social experiment a success?

It’s 6:30 am and the house is quiet, and I am fully dressed and ready to walk out the door. Normally, I would just head into the office and catch up on some things, but this morning I want to take some time to tell you about the Project Priceless wedding. I’ve already told you a little bit about why I was invited to this wedding, and the hoops I jumped through to get there. But there is more, so much more.

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Here is how Jordan and Brian explain the Project Priceless wedding on their website.

Project: Priceless is an experiment. The goal: to get Brian and Jordan married in the next year, as free-of-charge as possible. The method: the happy couple will borrow, trade, and accept offers of all the items and services that make up a wedding. Everyone who contributes to the occasion gets a shout-out, and any businesses or artisans who contribute get big shout-outs. Contribute, or follow along just for fun to see how things are going.

Can a community chip in and create a priceless wedding for an awesome couple? Let’s find out…

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I do love a wedding. But mostly, if I’m honest, I think I love weddings because they allow me to be flooded with all the memories of my own wedding, 15 years ago.

While so much of Jordan and Brian’s wedding was radically different than my own (like the Chaplan, Dr. Alan Viau, inviting all the guests to use the wedding hashtag and tweet out photos, for example!), there was so much love in the air that while my body was sitting in the fairytale setting of Stanley’s Olde Maple Lane Farm with the sun shining down on this young couple …

… my heart was under century-old gum trees in southern Australia, saying “I do” one more time …

While our decor for the reception was freshly cut sunflowers that had been lovingly grown from seeds by my mother-in-law and her husband on their farm, the Project Priceless decor included bright green and purple pom-poms that a friend had taught them out to make:

I’m sure you’ll agree that this decor looks fabulous! It was so fresh and fun, I just loved it. But what really made it all so especially cool were the personal touches. Imagine my delight, for example, when I sat at my place-setting and found a handwritten and handcrafted card thank-you card.

In fact, absolutely everything was handcrafted! Countless — countless! — hours must have gone into the preparations.

And in case you’re wondering why there were crayons in the photo above, it’s because each place-setting had one of those paper placements like they provide to children in restaurants to keep them busy. On it, guests were invited to complete a custom crossword puzzle as well as to doodle a picture of the bride and groom.

There were also a number of new traditions that, if I were to be married today, I would certainly love to incorporate into my wedding. I think I already mentioned the wedding tattoos. I love the idea of wedding tattoos, and I love this specific tattoo that Jordan and Brian had created by artist Sarah Rogers of Living Colour Tattoo.

I also think a candy table is, of course, pure genius! This table in particular was particularly amazing because it was from none other than The Candy Store. Oh so good! And all colour-coordinated to match the wedding colours of green, orange and purple!

And I would certainly follow this tradition: An In-Spirit Table. For so many reasons, I thought this was really special. This table was a collection of memorabilia from those who could not make it to the wedding, as well as those who had already passed on. These people were there “in spirit.”

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At the end of the evening, when the cake had been cut, the first dances had been had, and I felt I had done the best job I could as a live-tweeter, I slipped out into the evening air back to the parking lot to drive myself home.

I looked up and took a moment to admire the stars, so bright in the country sky. I had only been here at this wedding for but a few hours, and yet, it felt like I’d been wisked away to somewhere magical.

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When I got home, Hubby asked me how it had all gone. I told him it had been wonderful, just wonderful. Still slightly baffled by it all, he said, “Why was it called ‘project priceless’? Because it hadn’t cost them anything?”

I said, yes, I guess so. But I knew it was so much more. This social experiment was much more than a wedding without a price tag. So much more.

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August 18th, 2011

The Rolodex: To keep or toss?

A Rolodex is a rotating file device used to store business contact information (the name is a portmanteau word of rolling and index). The Rolodex holds specially shaped index cards; the user writes the contact information for one person or company on each card. The cards are notched to be able to be snapped in and out of the rotating spindle. Many users avoid the effort of writing by taping the contact’s business card directly to the Rolodex index card. — Wikipedia

Hey, remember these? I am still unpacking boxes for my new office and pulled this baby out of a box last night.

As you can see, my three-year-old son is in the corner of the frame, wondering what the heck this thing is. It would seem that the Rolodex has gone the way of the do-do bird, or at least the Underwood typewriter and land-line phone. There was once a time when a businessperson’s Rolodex was their absolute most important possession. It was their network and as we all know, a network can also equate to your net worth.

But now? I just google anyone I’m looking for. Or I search for them on LinkedIn, or if they are so inclined, I just tweet with them. I really can’t remember the last time I ever used or referred to someone’s business card.

This wasn’t always the case. In 1995, as a newly minted account representative at a graphic design agency, business cards were like nuggets of gold to me. Gold, I tell you! When it wasn’t so easy to find people and all of their credentials on line, a business card gave you a verifiable connection with someone. You had exchanged cards in person somewhere, so it wasn’t like cold-calling someone out of the blue. The same applied for any kind of referrals. I always kept handy in my Rolodex the cards of excellent printing company reps, translators, and even hair stylists so that I could serve as a resource for others.

But alas, my Rolodex now only serves to make me feel dizzy at the changes that have taken place since then. And although I haven’t actually used the thing in years. Years, and years, actually. I did cart it from job to job for nearly a decade. And now, I’m torn — do I keep it for memory sake ( interesting dust collector?) or do I accept that those days are over and toss it?

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August 4th, 2011

Do you fold your underwear?*

There are so many domestic subtleties that I am clueless about.

For instance, Hubby and I toss any kind of dirty laundry into the washing machine altogether. But apparently, whites are to be separate from darks (but is this really necessary if your clothes are already pre-washed and there is no risk of the dark colours leaking out onto the light colours?) and then I recall my friend rolling her eyes at me when she saw me putting towels in with jeans (something about the different textures? Goodness only knows, but since I never figured out a good reason, we still toss whatever is dirty all in together, regardless of what it is). I’m quite certain that my mother probably did explain these things to me eons ago when I first started doing my own laundry at home, but for the life of me, I can’t recall what the actual instructions might have been.

Now, when it comes to sorting laundry, I’ve developed a system which has worked since … well, ever since forever. One part of the system is one drawer dedicated entirely to underwear, which allows you to simply toss all the clean ones in there — no sorting required (see? good system, right?). I do not ever recall folding underwear. It just never occurred to me to spend the time folding underwear. They’re small, and no one cares if they’re wrinkled, right? I have no idea if my mother actually folded my underwear (no, I’m not being sexist, I don’t think my father did laundry although he did do a lot of domestic duties) when I was a young child. Come to think of it, she might have. And I just failed to appreciate it, like most of us failed to appreciate the often thankless work of a parent. And it’s not like I can go around looking into other people’s underwear drawers to find out what one is supposed to do: fold or not fold?

But we’ve just moved into a new house. And being overwhelmed, I asked my mother-in-law, who was visiting, if she would mind helping me get all my clothes sorted. I was so tired of living out of my suitcases and hadn’t had a moment to myself to work on my closet. So we stayed back one day when the rest of the family went out, and with her help, the entire closet was all sorted and organized within no time. It felt wonderful to get that task off my chest!

One thing that she ended up doing was a series of drawers. We decided that they would be a good spot for underwear, socks, etc. She then took charge and put everything in its rightful place in the drawers. When I looked inside, I couldn’t believe how neat and organized everything looked! I also noted that all the underwear were folded, and even the nylons (which I wear once a year for a wedding or a funeral) were all folded. In my mind I thought, ah, that is sweet of her but I won’t bother to be doing that kind of folding maintenance.

However, last night, as I was putting away some laundry, I realized how much I like my underwear all nicely and neatly folded. I don’t know what it is about it, but it gives me some sort of satisfaction to open the drawer and see everything all organized. So, I’m now folding my underwear**. For the first time, at the ripe old age of 39.

* With advance apologies to my younger brother who pinged me last time I mentioned my underwear in a blog post to let me know he didn’t appreciate me making him think of what kind of underwear I might buy. Oops.

** However, if I start writing blog posts about how I now enjoy ironing my underwear, you know I’ve fallen completely off the deep end. Send help stat.

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July 28th, 2011

Toilet-Training: Trials, Tribulations … and Tears?

Our boy Max, who is three, is our second child; our second round at this potty training business. The first round was about 6 years ago now, and more of a faint memory. What I remember of the experience was that I had timed it for when I would be on holiday, I showed our daughter Stella some Dora the Explorer underwear as bait, I covered the sofa with a towel and there was only one accident that I can recall. Easey-peasy, right? Right.

Now, it’s Max’s turn. Hubby is on holidays, so he’s been “promoted” to primary on this mission.

However, first things first, we needed some underwear. And I wanted to buy the underwear. I don’t know why … but this seemed like an important thing that I wanted to do. It’s a bit nonsensical, I know. But I really wanted to pick out the underwear. So I took a trip to Zellers’ on the way home from work and picked up some underwear with the characters from his favourite movie Cars. The fun underwear worked for one child, so I figured it would work for the other.

Sure enough, Max was quite intrigued by the underwear and after showing him that’s what Daddy wears, and Grampa wears, he was game to give them a go. Once they were on, I think he found them far more comfortable than hot diapers and he was hooked.

But (you knew there was going to be a “but” didn’t you?) it didn’t quite go like it did with Stella. He would do his business in the underwear and then tell us it was time for potty. We were going to need to work on this timing thing a bit more.

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Hubby has been working with Max on this for a couple of weeks now. There’s been a lot of laundry and baths, but as of yesterday evening, Max had two full days of 100% potty-training success.

As I was catching a bit of relax-time and had So You Think You Can Dance on the television last night, Hubby dropped down beside me on the couch. It was a particularly interesting episode since Lady Gaga was on as a special guest judge. She’s wacky in a great way – from the hair to the insane shoes she had on. But moreover, she’s also a generational icon, so I was trying to imagine what it must be like for those young dancers to have Lady Gaga provide them with advice.

At one point, Gaga was praising a young dancer so highly that she told her she would hire her on the spot. “Wow!” I said to Hubby, “Imagine having Lady Gaga tell you that you’re one of the best dancers she’s ever seen. I mean … for a young person, who would have danced for more than half of her life at this point, that would be a crowning glory moment! How could you ever top that?”

His response was simple: “When your son hits the Cheerios in the toilet*. That’s when.”

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It’s funny, but he couldn’t have been more right, could he?

All of us parents have gotten excited with the first “poo-poo in the potty!” moments. I, for one, could never have imagined the thrill, joy — even pride — that comes from toilet training. (Well, that could come from anything with the word “toilet” attached to it for that matter.) But it’s true. Toilet training a child is a big deal. A major milestone.

In a (really excellent) book I read recently, it pointed out how toilet training is also a thankless task for the parent or caregiver. In The Help, a black maid named Aibileen, who has toilet trained 17 white children noted that not one of them every came up to her later in life to thank her for it. Sure, they might thank her for her cooking or other particular kindness, but not one has ever come up to her to thank her for the toilet training them. She was saying this with seriousness, but it gave me a chuckle.

A chuckle, because it’s true — but also because it’s not true. Toilet-training isn’t thankless because it benefits the parent or caregiver – hello? NO MORE DIAPERS TO CHANGE!

And yet, it’s come to this … that I am actually feeling a pang of nostalgic sadness about never having to my child’s diaper again. Parenthood sure does strange things to a person, doesn’t it? I knew that toilet training would come with its own set of trials and tribulations. I just wasn’t expecting that it would also bring me to tears.

* Using Cheerios in the toilet bowl as a target for little boys is a potty trick that we’ve been using. Feel free to share any other potty training tricks in the comments!